Your Pain has a Puprose

We talk about blessings like they are confirmation of God’s favor over us. We talk about trials like they are something to get through. To endure and then celebrate when we overcome them or reach the other side.

We speak of blessings and trials in our life as if they are specific spots on the map of our lives. As if they can be clearly identified with identifiable margins. But the truth is, blessings and trials bleed into the fabric of our life. They seep and spread and cannot be contained or even always clearly seen for what they are.

The danger in simplifying the experiences of our lives into simplistic categories of blessing, trial, loss, gain, is that we start to create a narrative of God’s love for us based on the circumstances that we experience. And we start to watch others’ identify the signs of God’s deliverance and feel we are not delivered unless we can clearly see the other side.

But the other side is not a destination. The other side has more of the same stains bleeding throughout the threads. When we water down our experiences, looking for the relief from the pain as the only clear sign that God is real in our lives, we might end up feeling forgotten when we can’t see the relief we so desperately want. But that doesn’t mean God has forgotten you. God does not work in blessings as confirmation of his presence—he works in refinement. Which means that pain is just as much of an assurance as relief.

God has not forgotten you because you are still in pain.

Today we are used to instant results. We want results quickly and have a hard time if things take longer than we think they should—food, wifi, T.V. series—we want it fast and we want it now. We’ve forgotten much about the power of waiting. In the Old Testament we see just how slow things used to be.

In Exodus the Israelites are in slavery. God’s chosen people are being treated terribly by the Egyptians. It might be easy to loose track of just how long the Israelites are in slavery for, but when we read closely we see that Moses—the one who was adopted by Pharaoh’s daughter as a baby to escape death—is eighty years old when God calls him to go back and free the Israelites. That’s eighty years of slavery!

Yet, despite the length of time that the Israelites suffered slavery, we see that God has not forgotten them:

And God heard their groaning, and God remembered his covenant with Abraham, with Isaac, and with Jacob. God saw the people of Israel—and God knew.
Exodus 2:24-25

As you are watching others around you have their pain subsided and wondering if the presence of your pain means God has forgotten you, think back to the stories of the Old Testament and remind yourself that speed is not a promise that God makes. Speed is not proof of God’s presence. Patience in pain is a testament to God’s steady and everlasting presence in your life.

Blessings can come in the form of loss.

I wish that we didn’t have to experience pain in this world. I’ve had my fair share of loss—the sudden death of a friend, heartbreak, miscarriage…loss comes in many forms and with each pang we feel as doors close or emptiness sets in we are tempted to label these feelings as bad.

While the pain and loss of our lives is real, it doesn’t mean that it is pointless or for nothing. What we don’t have is just as significant as what we do have. Not all prayers are answered with a yes, in fact many seem to be answered with perceived silence or a resounding no. But in these times we can look to scripture to remind us that the goal is not for us to have a pain free and perfect life, but a devoted and faith filled life.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
2 Corinthians 12:9

Not all of God’s blessings are evident. God doesn’t owe us or give us explanations for all of the trials in our life. But our faith in God’s plan and purpose for our lives sustains us when we can’t see the blessing. We can gain fortification in 2 Corinthians 12:9, God is stronger than any of our pain, as well as the doubt we might struggle with while faced with pain and loss.

Pain isn’t punishment.

It’s a common lament to God: Why me? Why this? Why do I deserve to suffer? We tend to see pain as punishment. There are many examples within the Bible that show the presence of trials or pain as exactly that—punishment. But, there are just as many examples of pain that is not identified as punishment. Even more, there are many examples in the Bible that show pain has a purpose. Joseph sold into slavery to save a nation. The Israelites in the desert for forty years. The best example of this is Jesus hanging on the cross, not for anything he had done, but for our sins. For the salvation of the world.

For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps.
1 Peter 2:21

When we look to the cross as an example of pain with a purpose it helps us reorient our view of pain in our lives. Jesus showed us that suffering is not for nothing. Suffering is not a punishment, it is an offering. We must know suffering in this world to fully understand the beauty and true relief of eternity.

In our pain, we are given the opportunity to look to Christ and his suffering to “follow in his steps.” When we look to God in our pain and ask “How can I grow and learn in this moment?” rather than “why me?” we not only open ourselves up to growth but offer those around us hope in their own pain.

Not all sorrow will be understood or solved. But it can still lead you to joy.

My body is broken. To some of you that may sound dramatic, but it’s true. When I was 8 my body started attacking itself and the result was pain, swelling and parts of my body falling apart. For the rest of my childhood I was in and out of bedrest and unable to keep up with my peers when it came to any sort of physical activity.

Eventually much of my sickness subsided (they call it remission) and it was easy for people to label me healed. But the truth is, part of me will never be healed. It’s uncomfortable to admit but there are parts of my body that will always be broken. Most people don’t know it because I’ve learned to live with the cracks and imperfections but just because they are well hidden doesn’t mean they are gone.

I’ve been thinking a lot about sorrow and pain lately. I’ve seen many joyous posts about women who have dealt with infertility and have come out the other side with a miracle baby. I’ve watched people with cancer or other illnesses testify to God’s goodness as they are healed. And I’ve rejoiced with those people. But just has I have rejoiced with the ones who consider themselves healed of their sorrow, I have also grieved with the ones who don’t have the miracle baby or the complete healing.

Not all sorrow will be solved. If we only testify of God’s goodness through the gifts of relief, we will do a disservice to the ones whose pain remains. When we seek joy, even in our sorrow and pain, we offer an honest testimony to the presence of God in our lives no matter the circumstances.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
Matthew 5:4

If you are still in the trial, if you have experienced incomplete healing, if you have gotten to the “other side” but still feel the pain of what was…remember that all will be comforted. Joy does not mean you must abandon sorrow. Joy is knowing that God does not leave us in our incompleteness, but rather draws closer to our cracks.