I want to help. 
That wasn’t my intention. 
I didn’t mean it that way. 
You don’t understand. 

As I’ve been doing some self examination in the past months it’s come to my attention that intention can be a hurdle to growth. Words are imperfect and we often say the wrong thing. And when that happens it is easy to fall back on our intention. How many fights in my marriage would have been avoided if I had laid down my sword and listened to what my “innocent” words had delivered to my husband? In ignoring how someone feels in response to what we say we are showing that our virtue is more important than their feelings.  

I love words. I love the power of putting them together in new and descriptive ways. I love the sharing of our hearts in intimate conversations. Dreams put to vocabulary. 

We have a right to our words. We are free to speak however we want. But does that mean we should? Does our right supersede others’ feelings, emotions, pain? When someone says my words have hurt them, my hope is to learn why rather than defend.

How have your words hurt in the past?
How can you look past protecting your intention to hear others' perception?